The partner of a friend recently asked me ‘What is Stimming?’. After a quick scan of his facial expression (looked serious), evaluation of the context (we did talk about neurodivergence), and likelihood if he was genuinely interested or wanted to see if I knew (no, he probably genuinely did not know), I answered with ‘it is any kind of repetitive behaviour that calms down the nervous system in neurodivergent adults’, mostly associated with ADHD and Autism I will add here. ‘I understand, so it is like a tic.’ which sounded like an insult. I tried to explain that it is not involuntary ‘Look I do this by simply clasping my fingers and pressing my palms repeatedly, it calms me down’. Somehow he did not seem to get it.
I thought I’d write a brief blog to note some of the difference of stimming (like running hands over velvet, repeatedly listening to the same song – one of my most effective ways of stimming – drawing pen marks on fingers, pacing, twirling hair , repetitive blinking, chewing on pen lids, humming) and tics. A tic is by definition a sudden, involuntary physical release that does not serve a functional purpose. Stimming, however, is entirely different. It is an act of intentional self-stimulation that helps us actively process emotions and sensory input, a self-directed tool for nervous system regulation.